In relation to the photo, yes they are really my friends.
None of what I say is factual.
I don’t think I know the ins and outs of relationships and most certainly do not get it right all the time either. No where near all the time. All my writing will ever be based on, is my opinion and experiences. I also don’t doubt that I am guilty of some of these things I have experienced, but bare with me.
I realised after leaving Stroud who my friends were. I also experienced the same thing when I moved out of the flat me and Jake used to live in. The real ones will stick around, even though you have nothing more to offer than your time/company, which should be enough. Whether it’s asking how you are (and vice versa) once a week or coming to visit once a month. I still have best friends in Stroud that I haven’t spoken to for weeks that I love and adore and know are my true friends, so this isn’t aimed at anyone. But do they actually care how your life is going?
A best friend of mine (one of the ones I hadn’t spoken to for months) came and stayed last weekend. I wanted to tell her about my success but felt shy and embarrassed. She responded with shock and couldn’t believe it’d ever cross my mind that she would think I was showing off. Are you friends proud of your success? Do they share your blog posts, or even read them (go to your shows/praise you on your promotion/grades)? Or are they secretly jealous that you’ve sorted yourself out? I’m lucky enough to have a handful. Now you’re not drinking etc. anymore, do they want your company? Could you have a sober conversation lasting more than 10 minute, or are they only fun at Twisted Fix (local shit club)?
Do they only need you when they’re down? Could you rely on them to listen and advice when you needed them?
Do they say things behind your back and you know it? The biggest one for me. I have heard some people say some disgusting things about the other back home. ‘They should just die’, but the next day, their snap-chats are full of each-other? I know who I can trust. If you hear someone bitching about their best friend, I promise, through experience they’ll do it to you.
Do they do things they know would hurt you? Do they betray the unwritten code of conduct that friends automatically enter when they become friends, in terms of ex’s/secrets?
Moving away is the perfect catalyst, it filters out the ones you didn’t need to give your time to in the first place.
Just something to think about